Nothing special about this post just thought of talking about the one thing that i dreaded for the longest time, well actually it wasn't that long of a time but because it was so precious to me and vital a day just felt like eternity. anywaz, it's been three years since judgment day, three years ago this very day 22.02.03 that was a good day for me, or shall i say evening. and right now its a good one too. i mean yeah its not exactly ideal and all but it's as good as it can get for the moment.
this just might be back-dated to i have no idea what day, but i just put in the title then and am writing this now. haha!! hope that made sense to you people. still wonder if anyone really reads this, doubt it so yeah whatever! =D
now back to my judgement day! it was alwaz so passive the way it was written and expressed but when i read back on it and really start to ponder i realize how deep it was, how much i longed for the day and yet ironically how much i was scared and didn't ever want the day to come. scared and frightened i was, rejection, betrayal, mocking...everything....just scared and fearful of it all. am i still? no! not at all...i've past that day and have now arrived at the future of that day and i am glad that i went through it because the grass is so much more greener on this side!! =p it's a combination!!! haha!! i LOVE the moon!!! my moon....judgement is over and believe me after that one anything else that's thrown at me is much, excuse me, so much easier to handle! i can face anything i can do anything i can be anyone!! i can have it all!! the world and beyond...no limitations for anything, it's like i own the world!! and so much more!! its a great feeling and to know that it went the way i wanted it too and everything! i didn't expect that but then how many of us really are confident with high self-esteem? not many...especially not me! honestly, i felt like my question was going to be probed at...i felt like it would have been laughed at and mocked...i felt like it would have suffered from ridicule and so much more...but it didn't; i thought it did at first but then when my head cleared and i read through everything again i realized that my prayers were answered and i felt like it was just meant to be such....it was suppose to be that way....messed up but still true to the answer i seeked and desired...i got it!!! i got it and am still receiving...more and more everyday...and i am so thankful!! so very thankful to everyone and anyone who played a part in it and well yeah..thanks!! thank you for everything!! for the right answer, the treatment, the ease, the peace just everything...perfect timing..perfect beautiful timing.....couldn't have asked for it any better and i thank God for it....everything was perfect just like His plan for me..perfectly beautiful!!! =D
now it's bedtime and i needa get some sleep so im not late for work tomorrow...sigh cleaning 6D TTSH....needa pack and get outta there before renovations start....cyaz!! gdnite!
Sunday, February 04, 2007
A Cold Heart
Nope it's not that i'm in a bad mood or heartbroken or anything, it's just this new book i'm reading; this is the title! i'll tell you this though, it's one confusing book. the plot is good, real good but the lead characters and storyline changes with the characters and it's confusing because there are different characters solving different cases only later in the book do they merge into one case, one Cold Case (another good show btw).
i mean i have nothing against change in lead characters, just don't write it as "I" and then i'm left to continue reading confusing which "I" it is. sometimes the chapters continue with the same character and others change and it's not clearly defined but still overall a good book. haha!! i guarantee that you would be confused reading it as well, but still a good book!
actaully i did want to type something here yesterday but i forgot what it was...and now i remember but it's suppose to be a entry on its own and not combined with others. nevermind i'll just create it later then save it as a draft first, otherwise i just might forget it again.
shy is leaving for aussie soon, so that's one less friend to have around. and speaking of friends i think and feel as though i have already lost one. it's like wow! made a friend pretty close very fast then all of a sudden it's like nothing! just like that a friend is gone...lost...it's like they just fell off the face of earth, sigh! really did like that friend, a good friend that you can just be yourself with and tell everything, joke and laugh and really enjoy yourself, but oh well at least i still have my old friends, and my new ones from office!
so far i've made friends with andy my direct colleague and then there's all those temp and contract staff that are also my friends, din, jackson, yani! so fun to hang out with yani last friday, had fun eating KFC and talking at chinatown (the wrong place to be at this time of the year) haha but thomas was going there so we decided to get a lift from him to there and eat. lolx!!
kk i need to be getting to bed and sleep, this weekend has been pretty packed for me so not much rest got up early for both days and slept late both days. can't keep doing this because i don't want to be late for work too often. so off to bed i go!! Gdnite people...whoever really reads this..lolx!!! =D
i mean i have nothing against change in lead characters, just don't write it as "I" and then i'm left to continue reading confusing which "I" it is. sometimes the chapters continue with the same character and others change and it's not clearly defined but still overall a good book. haha!! i guarantee that you would be confused reading it as well, but still a good book!
actaully i did want to type something here yesterday but i forgot what it was...and now i remember but it's suppose to be a entry on its own and not combined with others. nevermind i'll just create it later then save it as a draft first, otherwise i just might forget it again.
shy is leaving for aussie soon, so that's one less friend to have around. and speaking of friends i think and feel as though i have already lost one. it's like wow! made a friend pretty close very fast then all of a sudden it's like nothing! just like that a friend is gone...lost...it's like they just fell off the face of earth, sigh! really did like that friend, a good friend that you can just be yourself with and tell everything, joke and laugh and really enjoy yourself, but oh well at least i still have my old friends, and my new ones from office!
so far i've made friends with andy my direct colleague and then there's all those temp and contract staff that are also my friends, din, jackson, yani! so fun to hang out with yani last friday, had fun eating KFC and talking at chinatown (the wrong place to be at this time of the year) haha but thomas was going there so we decided to get a lift from him to there and eat. lolx!!
kk i need to be getting to bed and sleep, this weekend has been pretty packed for me so not much rest got up early for both days and slept late both days. can't keep doing this because i don't want to be late for work too often. so off to bed i go!! Gdnite people...whoever really reads this..lolx!!! =D
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