CT'S ARE FINALLY OVER!!! =D

CT's are finally over and ha-ha not much of a diff cause mark informed me on the first day back to school that we only have 4 or 5 weeks of school before the finals. sigh. ah well. *shrugs* didn't do too well this CT but at least i haven't fail...yet...still needa get back CMB so yeah. anywaz, not much now except lessons resuming and yeah new topics being taught. other then that school's a bore. lately lectures, or should i say, this year lectures are just so dull. no life and no interest. sigh. oh well. but think i should be getting use to it cause from what i hear its only gonna get harder, like most things. tomorrow is my meeting with the EP teacher, both group and pair. hope she doesn't complain about our pics. i mean its not everyday someone takes photos of a cemetery but it was just somehow very appealing to us, so yeah!!

other then school, haven't been going to church for a few weeks, that's bad, but i've just been way too tired to get up and go, even when im at aunty shirly's still can't get up and go. i need rest and lots of it!! but with school back on and homework and assignments and everything where do i have the time to just crash and sleep for like at least.....10hours??

enough about school, kinda dull anywaz. yesterday was the first time i went to Swenson's and ate, last time i did go was with mom and dad for their anniversary. but it was still nice and well yeah memorable too. =D food was good too!! =D hahaha!! but now kinda hungry..lolx!! i liked that branch. thanks for taking me there, nice and yeah good food and very very good ice cream even though i ended up freezing while eating thank you for holding the glass so i wouldn't freeze and turn to an icicle. =) the grilled chicken yesterday that my sis and her bf cooked was good!! haha!! i know i know i eat alot sometimes but heck food is good for you and yeah i needa gain weight!! lolx!!

kk im gonna end here and go heat up some of that chicken and stuff my face some more, later think i'll get some work done. sigh.

• EM3A tutorial 3
• MI tutorial
• TP tutorial, lab, formal report, quiz 3
• EP project
• PQS project

So bored. finished revision. oh yeah shy if you read this and im not online, i figured out that last question so tomorrow i'll show it to you. i'll be in school at 7:30am, so yeah just come and i'll be there to show you. =)

i know i should probably be studying CMB and stuff but i just have no mood for anything. just feel like sleeping, but have to wait till 8:30pm to at least start the tape for recording. sigh. so now just gonna waste time here typing and writting probably another long entry. well not really another cause i haven't written one like that for so long now. honestly don't think i've been thinking that much lately. sometimes it makes me wonder whether im becoming less of person who thinks freely and openly cause it's like lately, there's nothing much in my head. and for some reason i feel weird and empty. like its abnormal or something. something should be there yet its nothing. kinda creepy. it was like when i went through the MI paper. it was like i know nothing and i didn't exactly read the text but the MCQ's and certain questions i was just answering them. damn creepy. its like i do know what im doing yet there is nothing in my head at all but yet its all there. see what i mean. creepy...

i know some will say its cool and what not but to me, a person who's mind never rest its like, just weird. its totally empty lately and its like no matter how hard i try to think of something i just cant. its weirding me out man!!

but not only that, even at night. usually i dream continuously and its like some kinda continuous story or something cause wherever it is i wake i will continue from there when i fall back to sleep. sometimes they link but sometimes they don't but they do just not so direct. its like its underlying or something. just the other night had a dream of wandering around some estate and stuff, then there was this guy in a yellow shirt and he was creepy and somewhat "dangerous". he walked around holding knives to the throat and stuff. then it was like after walking i was downstairs of this place and there were other people there, people that i don't recognize yet the face stays in my mind so vividly. weird huh?? its like i know them cause im not afraid and very comfortable but i just don't know who, never even met anyone that ever looked like them before. don't know. after that i was back upstairs in front of these two huge light brown doors, then once i walked through it was as if i walked into some parellel dimension or something cause the people that i do know and recognize just totally ignored me like they honestly don't know me, and yet i have these like total strangers coming to me as though i've known them my whole life. woke up thinking about it and trying to figure it out. some say that dreams are a window into our sub-conscience minds. how true it is, i have no clue. but i've been wanting it to end so i can figure things out but its always changing. the people are the same but the surroundings are always changing and the number of people changes too. if this is a window to mine sub0conscience im pretty eager to figure it all out. how true is it that dreams portray our past, present and furture. can't really argue cause i have experienced that whole deja vu thing. kinda creepy. i mean its like you feel as though you've experienced, ok!! no prob. but if like me and you not only feel it but remember it and cna predict what will happen next. damn scary. able of premenition?? maybe but i hope not, anyways God didn't give man that ability, only He possess that kinda power. i don't know, all i know is its not something that like scares me or what ever but it makes me curious and another thing is..lately i have had nothing much on my mind. no thoughts, no phrase, no rhyms nor rhythmes. weird and with all honesty i miss it. i miss having my mind go beyond what i can comprehensivly answer myself and i like thinking beyond one's limits and possessing the ability of inquistitivness. its pleasant and all too familar to me and now its all gone. i feel empty, but worse is i feel empty and without a thought. sigh. kinda depressing actually once you really get down to it. sigh.

now my main concern is, how will anything stay in my mind when its forever blank lately and yeah during CT week somemore...that's bad. really bad!! sigh. but yet again its something that i have absolutely no control over and must just let it be as it is. maybe stress could be a cause. for some reason i cant rest until i can figure out something, make sense of everything. i know this may sound really weird to read and might not even make sense but to me it does. im piecing all parts and only some where placed openly here but not all. if all then everyone would think im crazy. anyways somethings are personal. just don't know what it means but im determinded to figure it out so maybe i'll just knock myself out for tonight and see what happens. *shurgs* oh well. things should fall into place pretty soon, hopefully.

kk think i should be ending here cause this window is giving probs. kinda like its reached its max or something so yeah i'll go and get the tape ready for that show i need to tape. =D and then i'll be off to bed, for yet another night of trying to make sense of what little does and much that doesn't. sigh.

SMILE PEOPLE!! =D

Exam week

Exam week is finally here and yupz must start cramming like no bosy's business. started revision and what not but still. sigh. anywaz, today was PP2 and haha, made some really careless mistakes for the last question. sigh. what to do?? hahaha!! laugh!! hehe...=)

tomorrow is EM3A and yeah not totally prepared either and was doing but found out that the first common test paper, alot of my answers are different. kinda scary... sigh. just hope can do well this semester. oh well most is do really well for the finals. ha-ha yeah right. =P

anywaz, getting hungry and very sleepy, guess that whatever tablet does make you drowsy after some time. think its about time i took a short nap that way i'll feel better by tomorrow's paper and the rest of the week. so can't afford to get sick now man. could you just imagine if i did, i'd be such a gone case, it'll be pathetic!!

wasted man..just feel so wasted....

Sometimes i really wonder why i bother so much. is it because im some total idiot or what?? i mean i'd so like to really know why. sometimes i really wonder what's the point. i mean its like yeah i know its exam week next week and this is study break and everything but still, am i not to study?? just don't understand people sometimes. sigh. just that right now i don't know whether i should be angry or just upset and hurt by it .... ?? not too sure...maybe im the one who just doesn't get it?? wish i knew and wasn't so baffled by it all. but then again i feel like just belting out and yelling at someone. someone who seems as though they deserve it yet don't. am i that unreasonable?? didn't think so. maybe im just too brash at times?? don't really know about that either.

just that..how busy can one be?? that is if they're even busy at all!! lolx!! maybe i should just brush everything aside, how i feel and what i think and just let it be at that. but then every other time i've done that things just get worse. sigh. so what am i to do?? just let it be once more. for some reason it seems like that's the right thing to do, even though it seems to sux so much. = (

Been a while since i've written and that's because i've started cramming for CT's. sigh. and it sux big time, im such a lost case but yupz got bored after studying MI so decided to have a peek into my blog. =) thanks mark!! haha. first time you dropped by and said something. =P

yesterday was that graduation thing and all of us were like standing the whole day and yeah all were tired and worn. kinda funny watching everyone walking around. especially mark, every time he passed by with those VIP people, i wanted to laugh. =D but the songs they played were nice, inside the auditorium that is. after everyone was seated and the VVIP's were in we had to go up and get ready to stand in front of the stairs so the graduates won't go down to where their parents and friends were seating. both me and jia ling were bored with sore legs and haha, yeah we were kinda watching what everyone was wearing too. =P it was damn hilarious what some people were wearing. there was this one girl whose skirt was soo tight fitting she couldn't even walk. haha. and this other one with really high platform, flip-flops, and she was having difficulty walking. hmm?? wonder why?? lolx!! then there was this guy with a cute tweety and sylvester tie and another one with really high pants and wearing brown shoes, talk about bad combination!! and many more but to write all down here would take forever. =D

after that we took some pictures together with shuxin's camera. i have a picture of me and jia ling in our blazer. wanted amelia too but couldn't find her and once we did, she already changed and everything. *sobz* =( but there are some of the rest of us which is still pretty cool.

oh yes!! i think i finally know what im gonna buy lesh for her 21st b-day. a digital camera. she's wanted one for like ever and yeah think she really wants one and well kinda does deserve it after all this time. lolx.. just hope that im able to top up my savings in time for december. why must everyone be born so close?? its like once you celebrate one's birthday, its yet another's birthday as well. sigh. as long as i don't go bankrupt, hehe, its all good.

mom's still on my case about my room being a complete mess. and yes i know it is, my goodness i aint blind you know. just no time. and that's not an excuse just that when i do get the time i rather sleep. =P i know that's bad and blah blah but heck!! my room and at least i roughly know where everything is as long as no one touches anything. so its still orangized!! *hmpt!!*

i should probably get back to doing the tutorials for MI but i seriously have no mood anymore. sigh. only good part....its finally making some sense to me!! hahahaha!! but still no mood top finish up the tutorials. =P hmm?? let's see..maybe i should change the song for my blog?? oh and about the virus?? nevermind at least the music plays. =D hahaha!!!! im sorry but can't be that bad, or isit?? please say no.....=(...... should be ok after the first time of going in. the rest were like that, so should be ok. =D

anywaz i really needa get back to doing some work. sigh. anywaz tomorrow is another long day in school and else where as well. sigh. hate it when things clash with study break. oh well, what to do, no mood to trip now so yeah just heck-care with it all. =D
SMILE!!! =D

Was trying to play around with putting music in my blog but apparently its not working now and i have only a short time to try to fix it. according to jia ling it was an i don't know what thing. haha!! but i can copy everything over and all that stuff but it just aint working. well it was then it stopped. sigh. and i like this song. *sobz* nevermind kinda thankful to chin hou for giving me the song cause he had it!! thanks!! =D

other then that, last day was today and now its study week, but des is getting married tomorrow and that's another thing all together. and then monday is the graduation thing i offered to help in but im really hoping that it'll be somewhat fun. =) then starting from tuesday onwards its bury myself in my books and and study and try my best to make sense of all i've been taught so far. sigh. cant believe im so lost in class. lolx!! but starting from after common test its pay attention in class and try to understand regardless of how boring lecture may be or how monotonous the teahcer is as well. cause i know for sure that EP teacher is damn pissed off with all of us and well yeah, just don't get her sometimes, actually at all!!

and now because of des' wedding, its like total chaos with my mom, she's like so into getting everything done and getting after me to get this and that done. sigh. so now its get something in my stomach then get everything else that she's yelling at me to do, done!! ....sigh.....

Today was a little boring and yeah had a lot to do but not so bad. had to stay back and wait from 12pm all the way till 5pm for a briefing for monday's graduation thing. sigh. the whole day i'll be there but yeah i get cca points outta it so i ain't really gonna complain. =)

briefing was boring and after that we tried on blazers and everything. by time everything finished it was like, think 6:30pm or so. sigh. then walked over to the bus stop then yeah bus went by so we ran for the bus. lolx!! 961 takes forever to come and is alwaz, forever jam packed so yeah no lappy means RUN!!! hahaha!! but yeah it wasn't that packed and after a while got a seat. fell asleep after a while. lolx!! couldn't keep my eyes open. mom called a few times to make sure i wouldn't miss my stop. this morning she did the same thing calling me when i was in the train cause i was so sleepy this morning that i woke up much much later then i was suppose to. sigh. just couldn't get up. honestly i don't know how you can do it but i certainly can't. and yeah sorry too about all those times that you went home late and yeah it was kinda my fault for that. sorry!!

reached home kinda late too. sigh. and then by time got everything done, late man!! worse is, CMB assignment 4 needs to be submitted by tomorrow's lesson but ha-ha i did half way then saved it and for some reason haven't found the time to go back. but today once i write this, i'm gonna just search for the answers and read the notes another time. way too tired now.

think i'll just end here and get some sleep, anywaz for some reason com's making weird beeping sounds. kinda freaking and a little scary cause i don't know what i did and if it's suppose to be doing that, but i highly doubt it!!

Got a little bored and was finally able to fix everything and now....its working!! =D haha!!

anywaz nothing much going on lately, excpet the fact that mom's been sick for the past few days and now she's feeling much better. much much better!! =) now at least she's able to sit up and get around on her own. kinda scary when she couldn't even walk to the bathroom and i had to support her but, well yeah kinda scary cause im like so small and she's not and i was like so afraid of her falling and i not being able to suppport her. sigh. know she missed dad alot, cause she would have been there to help her and just lay there on the bed next to her and staying with her throughout. sigh. i tried that so yeah brought all my work in there and sat on the bed next to her and did my work while she slept. thought it was kinda cute the way she'd open her eyes just a little to make sure i was still there. felt kinda bad though. but at least she's much better now.

other then that?? hmm...let's see. told lesh about jia ling comong over to bake and she flipped and started yelling. at first i just got pissed at her cause i thought she was being unreasonable but after she told mom why and mom told me, i totally understood. came out and asked her why she didn't just say how she really felt instead of yelling and her response was, "cause i like yelling better!!"...sigh..what to do??

anywaz think i better stop here. firstly, tired and yeah kinda wanna get to bed early. second is i wanna try putting in music to my blog. just not too sure what song i want yet.. hmm?? lolx!!

SMILE =D

So cool!! new blog and everything!! just hope it works fine and slowly but surely i'll get the hang of this and how it works. still need to put in all the links and everything then should be ok. for now this will have to do. i like it!! think its pretty cool!! for some reason feel like i have more control and can personalize better with this one even if i am a little of a lost case right now. =P lolx!!

kk now to go back and mess around with the pic size so its not so big...=)

Testing

just testing out to see what it looks like..=)