Questions?

Who's to blame for a child's mistakes? parents or the child themselves?

If your girlfriend/boyfriend do something that you think is wrong but they thought was "just for fun", who's at fault to say sorry? You or them?

If your friend's cross moral boundaries, who's at fault? Who's moral boundaries were crossed and who crossed them?

So many times we ask similar questions, either about ourselves or others around us. People we see, people we hear about, but have we ever thought to question who is actually to blame? Or if there even is anyone to blame in the first place.


When we thing something is wrong, it's our own perception, if that particular person thought it was wrong I doubt they'd be doing it in the first place. The fact that they felt it was OK, or thought it was OK makes it harder for us to judge and place boundaries on what's right and what's wrong.

When raising a child the rules and regulations in household for different parents differ, as children we see this amongst our peers, and yes we question why some are so strict and some are so lenient. However, we must remember that parent's set boundaries and rules based on what they perceive to be the right way of doing things, or certain things that are OK to do; while others may agree or disagree it is up to them.

My point is that regardless of what is done, or who's to blame, or who's at fault the main thing is whether or not you can accept them for their faults knowing that although it may conflict with what you believe is right, it must might not be all that wrong either.

We make are own choices and decisions, parent's guide and nurture the best they know how and the best they can. Do we hold it against them if they mess up a little? No! We mess up too, way worse, just that they've been in that situation before and know how to handle it so you don't regret anything later on in life. Sometimes things seem so "cool" now but later on you're going to be thinking, "Oh my goodness what were we thinking?" and I'm serious! We will ask these questions because our parents have. They learn from experience and so do we.

Do not judge before you understand, and once you understand do not condemn, accept what they did as not wrong to them but wrong to you and do not follow or repeat what was done.

If actions affect you directly, then discussing what's right and what's wrong to the other party is always helpful. Know their stand point of things and get a better understanding of why it was done and not seen as something wrong in their eyes and only yours.

Remember the most powerful weapon we use is not our fist or any material thing we can grasp, it is our tongues, words can pierce so choose wisely!